3 Commando Brigade

Realism. Tactics. Fun.

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5 posts in this topic
Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 10:07 am     Super secret spam barrier
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Posts: 2165
Location: The Glorious Socialist Republic of Warringtonia
Ribbons:
Service Medal (5) Donator (1) Zeus Operations (1)
Operation Medal (1)

Your best/worst Christmas cracker jokes!


Because at this time of year we all need a good laugh?!
post your fave best or worst christmas jokes here, i've got a few that are real groaners!

I got an odd job man in, he was useless. Gave him a list of 8 things to do and he only did numbers one, three, five and seven!

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?
1 or 2?
1.... or 2?

I had my picture taken with R.E.M the other day.
That's me in the corner.

The Proclaimers' lawn is out of control and they are blaming B&Q! They've been to Bathgate, no mower, Linwood, no mower,...

What do workers at sports direct get for dinner?
About 5 minutes...

and because i'm a techie you get a techie christmas joke.

He's making a list, He's checking it twice
SELECT * FROM users WHERE behaviour="nice"
SQL Clause is coming to town.


Thank you, i'm here all week, try the veal.
Pete


Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 10:43 am     Super secret spam barrier
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Corporal
Corporal
Other duties:
Modder

Posts: 1163
Location: Bristol, UK
Ribbons:
Service Medal (3) Donator (1) Modding Team (1)
Kodak Commander (1) Public Regular (1) Operation Medal (3)
Weapons Operator (1)
Melonfish wrote:
He's making a list, He's checking it twice
SELECT * FROM users WHERE behaviour="nice"
SQL Clause is coming to town.

So dead :D


Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 7:38 pm     Super secret spam barrier
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Corporal
Corporal
Other duties:
Modder

Posts: 2295
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
Ribbons:
Service Medal (4) Donator (1) Modding Team (1)
Recruitment Team (1) Leadership (1) Asset Medal [Air] (1)
Public Regular (1) Operation Medal (4)
Melonfish wrote:
He's making a list, He's checking it twice
SELECT * FROM users WHERE behaviour="nice"
SQL Clause is coming to town.

Invalid statement, double quotes around a string... I ask you!


Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 8:07 pm     Super secret spam barrier
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Marine
Marine
Other duties:
Operations Design Team

Posts: 1178
Ribbons:
Service Medal (1) Media Man (1) Donator (1)
Mission Designer (3) Asset Medal [Air] (1) Operation Medal (3)
Old mathematics joke.

y = ln ((x/m) - sa) / r^2 


Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 11:33 pm     Super secret spam barrier
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Online
Marine
Marine
Other duties:
Operations Design Team

Posts: 1178
Ribbons:
Service Medal (1) Media Man (1) Donator (1)
Mission Designer (3) Asset Medal [Air] (1) Operation Medal (3)
Image

:P


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